I’m a liar. I lie a lot. I mean not a whole lot (don’t worry, ladies), but on occasion I’ll tell a white lie.
Some times, at work, to cover my or someone else’s ass. Some times, in life, to cover my ass, again. Some times, and this is probably most times, for no reason at all.
Actually, that’s a lie. There is always a reason for a lie. To make someone feel better about him/herself (no, of course, I think you are attractive!), or probably more likely to make yourself look better (trust me, that’s 12 inches). Sometimes, the lie is just a small exaggeration. Not hyperbole, but small changes to the truth. How much something cost… How long you did something… Why you couldn’t come out last night… Just little things.
But, this post isn’t about lies or the types of lies we tell. This post is about selling those lies. Being believable. There aren’t many steps (lying actually is pretty easy, that’s probably why so man people do it), but they are all very important.
In my experiences, the following must be true, to pull off a lie.
1. The lie must be believable
I want to say this is the most important part, but it’s not. I think rule three, above all else is the most important. This rule and rule two can be bended with a solid rule three. But this is still important, especially if you aren’t good at rule three.
This should be obvious. If the lie you tell, couldn’t also be true, it isn’t going to work.
Person: “Why didn’t you come out last night?”
You: “Oh, I was fellating Jessica Alba.”
Chances are that one’s not going to fly, even if it was true. Only push the lie as fair as it needs to go in order to cover what you are trying to cover. The lie doesn’t have to be extravagant. In actuality, it shouldn’t be. It should be contextually unassuming and nonchalant so that there is no reason to question it.
2. The lie must be irrefutable, at the time
This rule is a bare minimum. A lie doesn’t need to be completely irrefutable. Sure, a completely safe lie would be, as you don’t need to expand upon or defend it at a later date, but that isn’t always possible. Really, a lie only needs to work at the moment it’s told, it only needs to stand the test of a second. Part of this is knowing your audience, and knowing that they don’t have the knowledge about the lie to refute you.
This is particularly true for fact based lies. It also makes fact based lies the easiest to tell. How many miles is it from here to there? How much does this cost? You can answer these with any answer, you just have to come off confident in your answer.
Which leads to rule three…
3. You must believe the lie, too.
Good salesmen thrive on this. They tell it, whether it is true or not, like their hand is on the bible. When you tell a lie, that is really the most important part, selling it. Which becomes all the more easier if you can convince yourself that it’s true.
This seems obvious, too. If you tell it like you believe it, people have no reason to not to. Why would you not look like you are telling the truth, if you “are”?
Like picking-up people, it’s about confidence. Being confident in what you are saying is always good advice, regardless of the circumstances, but especially in telling a lie.